Had a nice lady come in yesterday with a nosebleed. This is usually no big deal. A little Silver Nitrate or nasal packing. But this thing was really flowing. I couldn’t see the source, so I just plugged it up with Merocel packing. She kept on bleeding, so I shoved a rhino rocket in there. The Rhino has a balloon that you inflate in the nostril, and it generally hurts like hell. I jammed it in as far as she would let me, and I filled up the balloon, but she kept on bleeding. It was just going down her throat. Eventually, she started having a hard time breathing. I looked in the back of her throat and saw a trail of clot. Using some long ring forceps, I had her say the standard “Aaaah”. Felt like the game “Operation”. She tolerated me sticking a giant metal instrument to the back of her throat remarkably well. It was a delicate procedure. The clot was slippery and slithered around like an angry leech. I finally got the clamps on it and started to pull. But it didn’t want to come. I stretched the tail of it to her teeth, but then it started to tear. So I shoved my hand in there and grabbed it toward the base with my fingers. With a little love, the clot finally dislodged and went “POP”, and I yanked out a clot the size of a small gerbil. The smell was nauseating but tempered by her husband’s sense of humor. He smirked that he was going to mount it on the wall like a trout.
What a guy.
I’m feeling a little guilty. Bob, who is a volunteer at Avista, and one of the nicest guys you will ever meet, was helping out in the ER the other day. He has a sunny disposition, and is always being exceeding nice to patients and staff. He usually gives me a some kind of pep talk, even when I don’t need one.
“Hellllooo, Dr. Wu”
“Hey Bob. What’s cookin?”
“Oh. it’s just another beautiful day. You are looking good!”
“Thanks, Bob.”
“You know what, Dr. Wu? Every time I see you, you look better every time.”
“Bob?”
“Yes?”
“Are you trying to sleep with me?”
Poor guy was mortified. Speechless. You have to understand. Bob is a 70 year old, white-haired former priest. He was so embarrassed, he couldn’t talk to me for the rest of the shift. Now I’m feeling bad about embarrassing him like that. Perhaps he will let me Hail Mary or confess or something that Catholics do when they feel guilty about naughtiness.
Got an email from Karli at Full Cycle. We are going to do another run of some of the custom designs we did for them over a year ago. Karli was our first customer when we were still Spare Tire Cycling. Pretty cool.
Working on the art for the plantable tag. Pic to follow.
It’s 650am, and I’ve been up all night. More on Priapism in the next post.
Team Alchemist Blog 