26 05 2012


Turning mortals into gods, and nice guys into Stravassholes.

Team Alchemist may do custom cycling jerseys and apparel, but we are also cyclists.  Not just a bunch of cyclists, we are friendly cyclists.   You aren’t invited to be on the team if you ride like a jerk.  There is a circumstance, however, that threatens to tip the scales of nicetude.   We’ve been able to manage the side effects of this irresistible force thus far, but many a rider has succumbed to this strange addiction.

A good number of folks around here have become obsessed with the phenomenon known as Strava.  Using a gps device, you can track your rides, and compare your times to other riders.   What otherwise would be just another patch of dirt or road, becomes a proving ground for virility and bragging rights.  Acronyms like “KOM” (King of the Mountain) and “PR” (Personal Record) have become commonplace verbage among Strava dorks and stalkers.  Yes, you can stalk your favorite athlete via their Strava updates.  Like a sad little voyeur, you can see if Sonya Looney really climbed Lick Skillet twice, or if Heather Irmiger still holds the QOM for Poorman’s).   I get updates on Taylor Phinney’s ride in the Giro d’ Italia.  Vicarious living is what it’s come to.  But you know what?  It’s kinda fun.

In Dan’s words:

‘”Ignoring my inner voice telling me to slow down on the Betasso link descent, I thought of a couple of new words:

Strava-ing: Doing something completely stupid in pursuit of a segment PR (note: a PR in the bottom half of overall rankings in no way dampens one’s enthusiasm)

“I was so Strava-ing on that descent today”

Strava’d:  when gravity snaps you back to reality.

“Dude, I was definitely gonna break Geer’s Betasso descent time, but then I Strava’d. I’ll be eating solids again in 6 weeks when they remove the wires. I’m gonna be so buff.”

Stravasshole :  an individual Strava-ing at the expense of common courtesy.

“The Alchemist guys are usually really nice, but that guy was a stravasshole”‘

We are working hard in the Alchemist Lab to devise fancy new devices to improve our Strava times.  It’s a work in progress.

Developed for the Betasso Link descent

Developed for the Betasso Link descent

Developed for the climb up Flagstaff

Developed for the climb up Flagstaff

Not sure what this is for, but we are pretty sure it will make you faster

Not sure what this is for, but we are pretty sure it will make you faster

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